My brain says no but my pants say off.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
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