I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
soo... how was my night?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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