But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
