Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Randomize
