Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I checked into jail on foursquare
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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