remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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