He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
