I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
