Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
