can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
