so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
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