My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
