just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Randomize
