3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize