whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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