you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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