It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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