So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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