i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
What a dumb baby whore.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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