so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
