his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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