Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
