Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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