So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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