I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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