your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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