i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Randomize
