Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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