Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
