Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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