he puts the penis in happiness.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
