Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
