So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
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