The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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