i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Randomize
