Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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