he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
