I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
