You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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