don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
