she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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