I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
