my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
