I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
