Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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