Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
BRING THE BAGELS
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
