We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
