Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
