Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Randomize
