Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
